Archive for the ‘Oxiclean’ tag

Your Daily Celebu-death……..   no comments

Posted at 7:55 am in rivercityvibe

They’re dropping like flies. The bearded mathematician Billy Mays cashed in his chips, the other day. For those members of the faithful who live overseas and are clueless as to who this guy is, he’s like the shamwow guy, but without the driving urge to kick the shit out of prostitutes. Basically, if Michael Jackson was the King of Pop, Billy Mays was the king of….errrr…infomercials.

billy-mays

The usual source tells us:

Mays suffered from hypertensive heart disease and that … was the likely cause of his death, though a final determination as to the cause of death would not be made until toxicology and tissue tests are completed

I can imagine there’s quite a line at the VIP entrance to heaven, right now. St. Peter will be manning the guest list, demanding that potential entrants stay behind the red sash until he has verified their identities. In an effort to expedite the process Farrah Fawcett will be fluttering her eyelashes, Michael Jackson will be moonwalking and crying SHA MON at every opportunity. I like to think Billy Mays will jump straight to the front by offering St. Peter a once-in-a-lifetime, two-for-one deal on Oxiclean……….

Written by Joe Bones on June 30th, 2009

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